Thursday, September 30, 2010

When I Don't Want To Smile

The busy life can choke the soul.  It breaks down the strong and causes her steps to become shaky underfoot.  It resonates throughout her body, this shaky, unsettled feeling.  Where did it come from?  When will it leave? 

She wants to smile, so she tells herself to be positive, to stir up some happiness and catch a glimpse of what it means to see glass half full.  

Her days seem long, full of mundane moments that tempt the heart-strings to doubt.

She prays.  That's all she can do.  She opens the Book of the Living.  She must.   

It's not just nice thoughts of sweet devotionals and quiet times...

It's a NEED to be with HIM.  A gut-wrenching, desperation! To be with one that walked before her.  The one that was tempted in all ways as her, yet without sin.  The One who experienced pain on the Cross of Calvary, if only for her alone.

Oh yes, we NEED Him!  Until we recognize that we need Him, more than our very next breath, we become self-sufficient.  Dependent upon self to get here and go there.  

We need to be dependent upon our Heavenly Father alone.  I need to.

So if He sees fit, to allow me to walk through these momentary paths of thorns and thistles, for His Glory, I must.   

These paths that leave blisters on my feet, scratchy scrapes on my arms and legs, a tired, weary body... 

I must. He wants me to become more like Him, for His Glory.

And through it all... the pain and the turmoil of the daily hurts; the kind that cuts knife deep within...

My Jesus, arm around shoulder, pulls me into His side, the one that was pierced... and whispers, I love you child.  He takes my hand, and I touch His side.  He gently leads me to the wounds in His hands.  He reminds me of the cost it took Him to bring me life.

Lean on me... don't ever stop leaning on me.  I will be your strength.  Joy comes in the morning.

He is Sovereign above all... 
I will trust Him.

 JOB 38:4-12
4Where wast thou when I laid the foundations of the earth? declare, if thou hast understanding.
5Who hath laid the measures thereof, if thou knowest? or who hath stretched the line upon it?
6Whereupon are the foundations thereof fastened? or who laid the corner stone thereof;
7When the morning stars sang together, and all the sons of God shouted for joy?
8Or who shut up the sea with doors, when it brake forth, as if it had issued out of the womb?
9When I made the cloud the garment thereof, and thick darkness a swaddlingband for it,
10And brake up for it my decreed place, and set bars and doors,
11And said, Hitherto shalt thou come, but no further: and here shall thy proud waves be stayed?
12Hast thou commanded the morning since thy days; and caused the dayspring to know his place;



  1. Beautiful post! Oh, how much I need Him everyday! The fact that God loves me enough to want me to have that one on one time with Him just amazes me. I need Him every hour, minute, second!

    Have a blessed day, Traci!

  2. This passage of scripture has always been one of my favorites, and always provides encouragement.

  3. This passage has always been one of my favorites.

  4. This is a stunning post. Thank you.

    Have a wonderful day.

  5. The first line captured me...

    Amy @ Missional Mama

  6. Absolutely beautiful and just what I needed today!! You are always so inspiring!!

    I am having a giveaway at my blog today if you want to stop by and sign up!!

    Love and Blessings

  7. Beautifully written truth.
    Love to you...

  8. This path you are walking looks familiar to me. You are right to seek the Lord in times of distress. Cling to Him and to the hope that you've been given. May God bless you with unexpected joy and smiles today!

  9. This has been such a slow, painful lesson that I think I'm only beginning to grasp--how much I desperately need Jesus. Him. Himself. Not more Bible study, not more church activity, not more discipline. Him. Well said.

  10. What a beautiful post... and so timely for me with all that is going on. Thanks for sharing...

  11. Beautiful post. You do not even know how much I needed this today. Thank you!!

  12. Thanks so much for stopping by - what a beautiful post and beautiful pictures. I feel like we've bumped into each other once before and I'm so glad to bump into you again. I'm now following back!

  13. The path may be hard but there's light The picture tells it well.

    So glad you found time to write this for us.


  14. Thanks for sharing your heart. I am definitely becoming more dependent for this time of my life.
    I haven't stopped by in awhile. Been missing you.

  15. Thank you, Traci. It is rare that a blog post brings tears to my eyes. I needed this so much today.

  16. THANK YOU for your beautiful words and thoughts, regarding our Lord's love and concern for us. I have been struggling with the mundane today and needed a upward focus laid infront of me.


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