Monday, November 29, 2010

10 Ways You Can Encourage Your Husband To Be The Spiritual Leader Of Your Home!

You married that hunk of a man you were dreamy over.  You planned your special day since you were 4, spinning and twirling round and round in your pink , princess dress.

Now you have been married for quite some time, and your husband is not the leader of your home you'd envisioned him to be.  The spiritual leader, that is.  What do you do?  

Here's what I did... after 5 years of marriage, and much prayer, my husband is now getting up at the crack of dawn to spend time in God's Word.  He is teaching little children at church... and I am more in love with him than ever!

Don't give up, Bride... I pray you find some encouragement here.

10 Ways To Encourage Your Husband 
To Be The Spiritual Leader In Your Home

1) Don't nag him about why he's not the spiritual leader of your home. (1 Peter 3:1-6)

This passage of scripture is talking about how to win an unsaved husband.  BUT... the principles here still apply.  

a) submit to him 
b) have chaste conduct accompanied with fear 
c) let the beauty of your quiet and gentle spirit shine

2) Pray without ceasing for him. (1 Thes. 5:17)

Never give up on him!  Never stop praying.  When I pray for my husband, I'm more likely to treat him with gentleness and respect.  What better way  to invest in your marriage than through devoted prayer!

3) You are still a work in progress. (1 Cor. 10:12)

We need to remember that we too, are a work in progress.  You and I are not the "be all and end all" of spiritual knowledge and wisdom.  Take heed, lest you fall!

4) Treat him like he is the spiritual leader.  Don't ever wish you had someone else's godly husband.

Treat him like he is the spiritual leader of your home!  Respect and honor him.  Cheer him on.  Encourage him.  Praise him.  Never dream of having someone else as a husband!  Be thankful for him!

5) Respect him, reverence, and cheer him on. (Ephesians 5:22-24)

6)  Encourage him to have godly, male relationships. (Proverbs 27:17)

Gently encourage him to seek out godly friendships and mentors.  Other men who are older and wiser may have the ability to disciple your husband.  It is not your job to lead your husband into spiritual enlightenment!  

7)  Be a team!

Have you become your husband's own worst enemy?  That is not in God's plan. You are married to one another, and have become one flesh!  Be a team!  

8)  Let him see Christ working in you!

Don't hide what the Lord is doing in your life.  Ask your Heavenly Father to show you how your obedience to Him, can affect your husband for good.

9) Don't give up!

Never give up on him!  Don't listen to the lies of the devil... God can and will work in your husband!  Keep praying.

10)  Let him lead!  

Let him.  Let him pray.  Let him lead.  Let him make decisions for your family.  Let him be responsible to the Lord.  Have you been taking over the spiritual role of your home because you think you are doing a better job?  Ask the Lord to show you how you can let your husband lead.

Linking up with Marriage Mondays!


  1. Great suggestions, Traci. I really found myself filling the role of spiritual leader and that's why my husband really didn't need to fill it!

  2. Excellent post.

    Have you ever read Marraige Mondays on Julie Sander's blog? A number of other blogs with posts on marriage link up to hers. Would be a way to get more traffic to your good article here. Here address is:

    Hope you guys had a good Thanksgiving. wb

  3. Beautiful post! Would I be able to share it on my blog?

  4. this is so true, for so long I pushed him to have my views and do what I thought made him the spiritual leader. Once I set back and did not push he rose to the occasion. The other thing I have learned is not to correct how he does it. He does not have to do a 30 minute sermon every day to be the leader of our house

  5. Thanks for this amazing post! Number 4 really stuck out to me! Praise God, I have an AMAZING Spiritual Leader in our Home! God has really blessed me! Some of my friends often try to compare their hubbys with mine... but some fail to realize the depths of hell that my hubby went through, that has brought him to the place he currently is with Jesus. PLUS, like you said, we need to make sure we are CONSTANTLY acknowledging that our Husbands ARE our Spiritual Head! :) Thanks for the encouraging post!

  6. Thank you so much for this. My husband is wonderful and loving husband and I know he loves God, but sometimes I wish he would step up more as the spiritual leader. I will definitely apply these tips. I shared on facebook as well! :)

  7. Love #3, such a great remimder!

  8. This is a great post, my friend, and a great reminder. Thank you.

  9. Excellent reminder, Traci. These important truths never get old, and we never "finish" needing to keep striving for them. Your husband is blessed!

    ~ Julie

  10. This is a very encouraging post! Thank you for sharing it!

  11. This is so beautiful, Traci! I think this is something many, many women struggle with. How fitting for you to post this! If you don't mind, I'd like to link to it from my blog!?

  12. I need to beefen' up on #1. Number 4 soooooooo true.

    Thanks Traci!!

  13. As long as I'm looking at #3, I have enough to work on than workin' on my husband's nerves about leading. LOL.

    All joking aside, I'm thankful that my husband is taking his leadership role seriously.

    I agree with Julie, your husband is a blessed man!

    You're phenomenal girl!

  14. Great post, Traci! Thanks so much for writing this and being an encouragement. :)

  15. Excellent advice, Traci! I have done this very thing with my husband, and I'm here to tell works!

  16. I agree with Kathryn. I too have a wonderful husband, and this is the one area I really struggle with. I don't nag him - it's not my way, and I have tried little suggestions here and there to make him lead. I try to take every decision to him for him to make, but when it's not in a person's nature, it's really hard. He's a wonderful man, a loving husband, but this is what he really struggles with. I don't know if he'll ever be able to reach the goals (very simple ones) that he himself would like...
    I find it hard to be content with this particular aspect of our marriage because I know it's a biblical matter - ie, he *should* be the spiritual leader.... but sometimes I feel I just have to learn to be content with things as they are. I know I'm so well off compared with countless other women.
    Sorry - didn't mean to go on so long! x

  17. Great post! These are excellent suggestions for wives who's husbands aren't necessarily comfortable or willing to be the spiritual leader of the home.

  18. These are ALL great....I would also add another...when he fails, respond with love and encouragement. Not "I told you so" or "I would have done it this way". He needs to know that even when he fails you are there for him and still love and respect him. One if the key ways to show unconditionally love to your man!


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